Gabbie... and ECP...

Today was a kinda mixed up feeling..
but yup,
felt much better..
Gabbie has to leave us..
to stay with his uncle,
coz ya.. result..
It's hard,
but we will still meet up rite?
and we had lotz of chit chat at Serangoon park,
which i nv even been to even though it's so near..
LIKE OMG!!
i didn't even noe it exists o.0
lol
but yup,
finally been there,
to chat =)

Then,
i met Quan in school,
coz i promised to go out with her to the beach..
yup,
to try to throw out everything kept within us,
all those bad stuff,
yup,
to find time to throw it all away!!!
and finally,
East Coast Park,
we finally went there..
The feeling of being at the beach,
make me so freaking good..
i wonder,
how's Quan feeling rite now =)
i love going to the beach..
i love the sea..
so much has happened.
so much..
even kor poh's ashes are set free into the sea..
argh.
Sea..
my memory..
my favourite..
yet,
i'm still afraid of sea =x
yup,
but the best is still within it..

Today,
in the bus,
i met Nic at Paya Lebar..
like OMG?
so coincidence?
i think it's pure fate..
like so cool man,
like how could it be this coincidence,
like 1 min later then we would not meet,
but like we freaking meet..
LOL
=)
yup,
seeing u cheered me up =)
lol
like wat u said,
noe u will support me.. =)

Quan and I had Mos for lunch,
2 huge freaking milk tea,
lol =)
and i love the burger =)

It was kind of a Science Trip and i became the teacher..
LOL =)
yup
we saw a man catching worm on the beach,
was damn cool,
and i'm amused man,
like kinda easy =)
lol,
just some prawn "juice"
then see the movement of the sand,
and pluck it out,
that's all ..
so cool..

We picked up sea shells..
i was kinda picky coz i've seen much more unique shells,
but yup,
it's kinda hard to find beautiful seashells coz it's artificial beach..
LOL,
but yup,
we still found a few beautiful ones,
like the "butterfly" that's wat i called it =)
and a lot more..
kinda great shells we picked up.. =)
and we stared at a Lala so that it will move,
but apparently it dun wan to x.x
so,
i got my pants wet for nothing..
like wat d heck..
LOL
=)
yup,
and i still build The Great Wall by Stevenn,
and the "Nile River"
LOL =)

then we had some theraphy by small fishes biting Quan's leg..
saw a dead jellyfish.
and Quan was so amazed..
lol
kinda norm to me,
but yup,
we had some lessons =)
lol,
like we poked it,
and its support system is hydrostatic..
lol
Quan named it "Jello"
we buried it,
RIP JELLO..

LOL
we talked bout coconut tree..
"like why is it slanting towards the sea..
since the breeze is blowing towards the land"
Quan asked..
my conclusion is,
coconut tree grows at nite!!
coz land breeze at nite blows from the land to the sea,
LOL..
wat a lame conclusion
=)
how far it's true,
i gotta check =)

Sea..
Beach..
Breeze..
we had long chat and walk on the sea shore.
like it was damn fun,
like everything has just being blown away by the wind,
left was all the happiness,
and contentment,
and memories..
I remember that moment when my bro release the ashes of kor poh into the sea..
i remember the scene..
i really do..
i miss kor poh..
and,
i remember lotz of things at the beach..
Chatting with XueYen and promises made,
Taking photo in suit and gown outside Orient Star Hotel during Installation,
Chatting with ChunYen Kaizia Fred Meichern and soforth
spending time with the Anderson Leos by the beach..
like those moments are so precious
yup..
and i miss those moments..
=)
and now i would miss the times spent with Quan,
and also the class outing last year.. =)
arh..

I LOVE THE SEA =)


i miss kor poh...
forever..

Disappointment..

Finally,
it's my time to be Emo..
i've been smiling,
i've been trying to keep it positive,
but today,
i, myself got affected..
it was when physics p3 came back..
17.5 over 80,
and it's like badly failed..
argh..
i noe that would happen..
coz i had not much time for physics..
but yet,
even though i've spent time on other subjects,
it still appears to be the same,
like it's so badly done..
USES,
this is wat i have rite now as my grades,
where S and U indicate fail..
What to do?
like i tried my best in chem,
i wanted an A,
i really do,
but argh..
and Math..
i practised,
i tried my best,
apparently i still fail..
argh..
Wat's this man..
it's like the worst results ever..
argh,
i'm tired man..
even though i've tried so hard..
maybe it's not enuff..
i noe,
i will do my best..
Sms-ed mum bout this disappointment,
and mummy replied that dun worry,
mum and dad always behind u to support u..
argh..
i felt so touched and motivated..
i shall,
start studying..
i find studying so enjoying rite now..
i love going school..
i love lessons..
i love my class..

and around me,
i'm grateful,
for whoever i have..
I've always thinking that in some of my frenship,
i'm demanding too much,
i need the fren more than he/she needs me..
but it turned out,
i'm needed,
silently..
and i'm a support to them,
a place to really talk when problems come,
and to really share problems and joy..
yup,
i maybe much more expressive,
which makes me feel like i'm talking most of the time..
yup..
frenship,
no nid to be perfectly equal in the giving and taking..
the most important is the willingness to sacrifice for each other..
and not thinking bout the repay,
not bout how much u give or take,
it's how much u are willing to put in for that particular frenship..
i learnt it from Nic,
like seeing me in toilet,
and he noes i'm around to support him,
jus that short seconds where we met in the toilet,
would be much enuff..
i used to think best frens need to spent lotz of time to bond,
but yup,
this is the frenship i believe in..
i would put in my effort =)
and some of those frens whom i'm close with,
these promises need not be made,
coz it has been silently made between our hearts,
between our soul..
Friends Forever..

Life..

Life's so UNPREDICTABLE..
Pn Ho Chew Siah,
has just passed away today,
on my dad's birthday..
Argh..
wat a day..
was supposed to be a happy day,
yet,
it's ok..
We tot Pn Has all the while ok,
like she has returned to teach us and
she was perfectly fine from her appearance,
and yet,
Cancer took over her,
and she lost..
Rest in Peace Pn Ho..
You are the Science Teacher we loved so much,
thanks for everything..

I heard bout 2012,
Apocalypse..
Dooms Day..
Like another 3 years,
this world will end..
is it true?
i'm kinda worried..
i love my life,
i love it even more now.
but if it's like 3 years,
what can i do?
how would afterlife be like?
how would everything be?
argh..
sometimes,
things just kept me thinking..
and i wonder,
what would the world be after i leave this world,
how would i be?
where would i go..
and will i meet every1 i met again?

Sometimes,
we take things for granted,
like we are still young..
who noes what might happen to us tml..
who noes some1 around us would just leave us tml..
*TOUCH WOOD*
but yet,
we take everyday with a dragging feet,
like we are tired of life,
indeed we are sometimes,
but we shd be able to keep up the pace..
Life isn't just suffering..
If it's just suffering,
then it would be hell..
there's always a reason for us to smile in our lives..
just look around,
even though we are at our deepest valley,
there's always rays of hope..
coz our Creator wouldn't create a path that leads us to a dead end..
it's all well-planned..
and we need to be grateful..
that would make life much better,
to be contented,
to be satisfied,
to be loved,
to love..
and to do stuffs we like..
Always,
i like to have a smile on my face..
it cheers ppl up..
it really do..
and when i smile to ppl,
i get back a smile..
Yup,
it's just so natural,
the feeling is like so mutual,
and it help cheers up the atmosphere..
i love to smile..
i love ppl who smile..
especially from the bottom of their heart..
=)
thanks for my frens who has always keep me smiling,
always gives me a reason to smile,
and always make me feel good with ur smiles..
=)
thanks..

Today onwards,
i shall cherish my life even more,
even though i dunno how,
but i will find my way..
Glad to see that nic acknowledged me in his blog..
Even though it's like so short,
but yup,
i will really support u Nic..
Buddies forever,
even though u will try ur best,
i would put in even more effort..
i hope to chat with u
and i hope u will cheer up..
i miss chatting with u
and i really mean it =)

We had a kinda awkward moment,
like i think it was a wrong topic,
made Quan and i in weird mood..
i should be sensitive enuff,
and i should now how bad it would affect u Quan..
sorry ya,
and i'm so sorry..
i will still tell u stuff i think,
i will =)
somehow..
glad we are fine=)
nice ice cream we had =)
and i love chatting with u!!!!

Had movie with ZhanPeng,April,Catherine,Benny,MingHan..
was kinda fun,
lol,
sorry ZhanPeng..!!
for i-noe-what
LOL
=)
really had great time with u all.. enjoyed a lot
eventhough the freaking movie is kinda disappointing =)
but yup,
time spent together is much more significant =)

Tml will be a brand new day,
i mean today..
LOL
i shall cherish my day =)
i love my life,
i love school
and i'm gonna miss this world when i die,
i really will =D
so yup,
i shall make full use of my life =)

Happy Birthday Daddy.

It's 16th July..
Happy Birthday Daddy.. =)
i'm sorry for not being able to celebrate ur birthday with u..
even though we dun really emphasise in celebrating birthday,
i still love birthdays coz there's cakes,
parties,
smiles,
laughter..
I wanted a birthday party very badly,
I love cakes..
I love birthdays..
Daddy,
i love u a lot..
and i'm missing home right now..
i wonder how mummy's doing..
ya i noe it's hard,
but yup,
there's always a way to every problem,
so worry not k?

Daddy,
hmm..
i love u a lot
and i remember how u fetch me out to town
like when i was so small..
and i can't even fully hug ur belly..
until when i was in secondary school,
i realise u r always there to protect me..
and u r there to block the rain,
to shield me from the rain while fetching me on the bike..
i took it for granted,
until i ride my own motorbike,
until i got hit by the raindrops..
only i realise,
u r always shielding me..
and after korpoh has left us,
u r the one who really take care of our welfare =)
like my lunch,
my breakfast and my every meal,
u really took care of it and make sure,
there is something for us to eat..
and daddy,
i'm so glad to have u.
like u dun really demand a lot,
and u have low expectation,
yet u r very firm..
Dad,
i'm glad to have u.
really =)
i love u so much...
hope u enjoy this day,
ur birthday..
Mum promise me to go out for a meal with u..
so yup,
cherish ya =)
lol..
and take care of mummy..
Thanks daddy for everything,
and sorry for everything i've taken it for granted..
once again,
Happy birthday Daddy!!!

Apologise

Listening to Apologise...
A lot of things running in my mind..
like bout my midyears result,
like bout how helpless i am to my buddy,
like bout how i'm kinda a disappointment the other day,
like bout what i'm gonna do for SL tml,
like bout how i'm not spending much time with Rud,
like bout how i miss my close frens now..
like bout how regretful i am for some mistakes that cannot be changed..
like bout how much i miss my hometown frens..
like bout how i miss my family..
like bout how i miss my home..

Argh..
Midyears was disastrous..
=)
Mrs Huang approached me,
and said i need to work more..
I did put in a lot of effort in chem,
ya but apparently,
it's a worthless effort..
aihz..
maybe i'm not very very familiar bout wat i studied,
but yup.. aihz..
i did my best for mid years..
sorry..

Quan,
ya,
sorry coz i can't really help u..
like i'm so darn helpless now..
sorry for not being able to comfort ya,
and i was playing games just now,
didn't noe u needed an ear.
sorry..
ya i felt guilty..
and apparently,
i can't do much,
not even talk to u properly..
coz i'm kinda down in my mood..
sorry..

Jamie,
bout the outing,
sorry ya,
i didn't noe everyone's going..
and at first i kinda dun give a damn..
coz it's like a gathering and i got no messages..
i didn't noe it meant so much..
and i was in sensitive..
sorry..

About Service Learning,
like tml,
i'm empty-minded,
i dunno what's going to happen,
or what are we doing..
and to Hannah,
i didn't really help u in SL,
like i had lots of experience in organising SL,
but apparently,
in Singapore,
i felt kinda clueless to start something like tat..
and i didn't even try to help u..
ya..
sorry..

Rud,
these few days,
omg,
i spend so little time with u..
i noe u wun be reading my blog,
but deep inside me,
i really love u man, my buddy..
like u iron school uniform when i didn't do it the nite before..
like u r always there to offer hugs,
that makes me feel so assured,
and u never complain for my late coming back from school...
like u always been waken up by me in the midnite..
like u always back me up..
thanks buddy..
For not being to really spend time with u ..
sorry..

I miss,
lots of things,
even if i have just spent time with them,
i still miss them..
like my classmates,
like 31st,
which i'm gonna meet tomolo,
like Nic,
like Lou,
like Mushy,
like HuiQuan,
like RJ..
like Rud..
even though some i may have just talked to,
or some i've just met today,
or some is just beside me,
i still miss them,
they really mean a lot to me..
and,
if i kinda neglect how u all feeling,
coz sometimes when i get too close to u,
i tend to take things for granted,
like i'm insensitive and stuff..
if i ever made u angry or annoyed,
sorry..

A lot of things,
i've done,
a lot..
really a lot..
that made ppl angry at me,
that made ppl fed up at me..
and a lot more..
like really a lot,
which is kinda inconvenient to say rite now,
like i've hurt them or annoyed them..
sorry..

Since ChunYen's sms.
i realise i seldom contact my hometown frens..
it's just when i go back,
i contact them..
that's all bout it..
like,
i didn't really like make an effort to email,
or even checking up emails..
but it's like there's this gap..
like we have no more common topic..
ya,
i noe this would happen,
but yup,
i still love u all..
like dun give up this frenship we forged k?
for not contacting u all..
sorry..

Home,
=)
i miss home..
i miss daddy, mummy and kor kor..
ya,
i miss kor poh(grand aunt)..
our home,
consist of 5 ppl,
never really felt the love daddy and mummy gave me
coz i always think they are bias-ed..
ya,
but then,
now,
i realise
being a parent isn't easy..
coz u need to care for each and every child u have..
like home,
it's one big family..
to me,
i realise the importance of home quite late..
my priorities on home is always 2nd last,
which is like before myself..
now,
home,
is one of the top list =)
like i miss home now..
and i can even cry now=)
daddy, mummy,
i love u and thanks for everything..
korkor,
thanks and i love u =)
for wat we fight, for wat we argued,
i still love u..
Home,
there's no where i rather be..
i miss home..
and for realising the importance so late,
for hurting ur heart, mummy,
for being so naive, daddy,
for being so insenstive, korkor,
sorry..

Apologise,
Sorry is not the hardest word..
why put that ego so high?
Sorry..
Sorry..
Sorry..
Thanks for happening in my life =)

Reflections? hmm.. =)

OmG,
i can't believe Mid Years has over...
now,
it's the time to wait for results..]
i know is scary..
yup..
=x
like i'm not doing very well..
yup,
didn't really put much effort also..
so even if i get bad results..
that explains all..
x.x
but by the way,
i'm satisfy coz i did try to study.. =)
like before exam with Nic,
and with HuiQuan..
yup..
=x
lol..
i gonna miss this study period and i hope i would do much more..
like after school,
i wanna stay back to study...
yup,
i wan tat to be my life =)
i like that kind of slight stress life =)
i shall start doing a lot of tutorials..
and do lotz of practice to prepare myself for Pre-lims..
hmm.. i hope i will do well by As.
yup =)

By the way,
today had a freaking nice day with my class..
Like damn nice la =)
lol..
like 15 of us went to watch Ice Age 3
it was freaking fun,
like we laugh our asses off in the cinema,
like who cares =)
LOL..
i love mua class..
and this is wat keeps me going to school =)
supportive classmates..
=)
we played pool and bowling..
like hell fun.
i really enjoy the times we had..
i really do..
omg..
Spent meals with u all..
shared the stress we felt for MYE,
and then talk bad bout teachers.. LOL..
so fun..
and talked bout game,
shared moments together,
with Prae, my darling =)
lol..
dun mistaken..
that's how i call her =)
i miss all of u..
argh.. i'm gonna miss these times we spent..
can we stay forever?
can we keep in touch forever?
it's hard,
i noe.
but..
i really want this to carry on..
i gonna miss all of u after Alevels...

today
chun yen sms-ed me just before the movie,
telling me that he miss me..
like always,
he calls me baka..
yup,
i'm baka..
actually i miss u too..
i still love those few songs we both shared..
" One more time, One more chance"
"Fukaimori"
and a lot more..
these are songs we shared,
i will nv forget man!!
lol,
i miss u,
but i really dunno how to express..
yup,
i miss the yellow flowers falling down from the trees back our class,
that was like so memorable..
how could we possibly sit down there like the other day,
observing the falling petals of the flowers,
like snowing,
and it's really so panoramic..
i miss home suddenly..
i miss alot of things rite now..
Drew, i miss u..
WanXiu, Kaizia, ZhiHan, SiewPei, SeongJin, XueYen, ChingCin,
AiMay, SuiCheng, HuaKeat, TeckCheong..
omg,
i miss u guys man..
and,
i really miss u guys..
Bel, u too.. =)
of coz,
my family members..
omg,
i hope everything' s fine..
i really hope so..
Okasan, oji chan.. =)
i miss u 2 =)
how's home?
Niisan..
how's ur work?
hmm..
omg,
i dunno wat will happen like tml,
i really miss u all =x
omg..

I think i've missed a lot of things,
and i'm kinda regretting,
and i felt bad..
Like my ottotto san,
i just lost him,
for no reason..
i noe it's my fault,
yup,
but can we even still be frens?
hmm..
i miss Nic,
and he's not replying my msg..
HuiQuan is always there for me..
she always replies my msgs..
and Rud,
he's always by my side..
what more do i want?
LOL
i'm so blessed..
i am so grateful..
i'm so thankful..
all this Fate that my creator has given me,
thanks for all the arrangement,
thanks for all the hardwork..
i really love what i have..
i really do..
i am so satisfied.
even if i have to die tml,
i think i wun regret,
coz i've already spend my life so happily..
yup..
but yet i treasure my life..

I realise life is just like an MRT train..
Ppl hop on to ur life,
gets into ur life..
u will know their presence,
and they exists..
but if they do funny things on the MRT,
u will remember them..
like some just came into ur life and really impactfully carve something in ur life..
like some ppl just exist for just being there for u.
of coz, there are culprits in ur life..
but yet,
there are ppl who leaves u,
and gets off the train..
like u wun noe when they'll hop into ur life again,
and u will never noe..
OMG..
i'm emo-ing..
i really miss alot of things..
and i really wanna treassure what i have.
but i can't do it.
i just dunno how to do it i shd say.
i dunno how to express me even further,
even more thoroughly..
but yup,
i hope my actions explain..
i hug for a reason..
coz i care,
i touch and poke u for a reason,
coz i wanna make u smile =)
and i really wan everyone beside me to be happy.
then life would be so much better =)
i love my life..
I love my journey...
i love this MRT train.. =)

Eve of Last Day of MYE

LOL..
hmm..
back to blog again..
Bel must be scolding me for not blogging..
LOL..
anyway,
was doing fine this few days..
in the midst of MYE,
lol,
still playing game,
and i still go out to study ok =)
Yup,
aihz,
studied so hard,
yet,
i'm still doing so bad.
Like OMG..
i noe how much i need to work now..
everytime i tot i've done a lot,
it seems like just the tiny bit of things i noe..
Yesh,
my life after mid years,
shd be more of studying and lesser GAMES!!
=)
anyway,
Zhan Peng sms-ed me and made a promise for
best fren forever..
ya,
the other day,
Nic also promised me that we will try our best to keep in touch..
HuiQuan,
aiya,
no need any promise one,
we will be buddies forever..
and Rudy =)
LOL,
no need =)
we noe we will not forget this frenship..
and many many more,
hmm.
i really hope to keep in touch..
=)

anyway,
went swensens today,
my 1st time,
1 for 1 meal,
damn worth it coz it's damn nice =)
had fun with class for lunch..
=)

Read Nic's blog..
kinda long since he had posted..
ya,
i like reading his blog coz it shows how he thinks..
he thinks very differently from me =)
yup,
so it's kinda nice noe-ing him..
=)
sorry nic,
coz ruin like 1 week of ur privacy..
LOL =)
it's not a bad thing to like to spend ur own time..
=)

I'm still waiting for Huiquan's blog..
=)
hmm..
bleh~~
anyway,
i spent lots of time with hui quan in this midst of MYE,
like studying in School Library,
Bishan Library..
Having breakfast in Yakun,
and lunch with class where both of us are always there..
=)
so nice having some1 to support and keep me studying..
LOL..
even though pynx think we both are ErHmmm.
LOL
yup,
we both noe =)
so, ya~~
i had great time with ya Hui Quan =)
Thanks.. Lotz...

Aihz..
I can't wait for tml,
and i can't wait for MYE to end..
On the other hand,
i want MYE to continue,
coz i like this pressure i'm having..
to force me to study..
but yup,
the 1st one is more than the 2nd one..
LOL
anyway,
tml we will be watching ICE AGE 3..
i can't wait.
OMG,
the whole cinema shall filled with laughters by me and Eddie..
LOL
=)
Eddie,
let's own the cinema tml =)
LOL
haha..
hmm..
it's 9.30pm now..
i shall mug a bit..
yup,
haven't done much for Phy..
hmm..
Jiayou ppl,
for those who have paper tml,
It's ending like less than 15 hrs =)
Jiayou!!!
=)